i think it was to send you all a gospel version of the electric slide/cha cha slide/cupid shuffle.
heard this on the radio. it’s called the ‘sanctified slide.’ heard it in the car the other day. immediately said to myself ‘SWEET MOSES, PLEASE LET THERE BE A VIDEO.’ and you know what? there totally is.
i’m not sure why all of this made me so happy. i think i just like it when they make gospel versions of things that weren’t gospel in the first place. like if they made a gospel version of ‘pumps and a bump?’ i’d actually buy it. i haven’t bought a CD since 1999. damn a CD, even, i’d get that on cassingle. i also really like the dude calling out the moves. Jr. Deacon Thompson. in his pink tommy polo. i bet he wears that to every 1st Corinthian Leather Baptist Church picnic.
for those of you dancing along at home, the dance steps are as follows:
1 – walk in the spirit (even the spirit appreciates a good two-step)
2 – shake the devil off (did u know that jesus harlem shook lucifer away during the temptation on the mount?)
3 – stomp satan lower (satan: “ARISE, MINIONS! TONIGHT WE SHALL TORMENT THE EARTH AND CURSE ALL THAT IS—wait.. wait a second… is that Sister Jenkins orthopedic nursing shoes i’m feeling? shit. we gotta try this again tomorrow night, guys.”)
4 – dance like david danced (apparently, after slaying goliath, he threw his hands in the air and proceeded to wave them as if he just didn’t care. in a circle.)
GO IN PEACE + SIN NO MORE. also, clap, clap-clap your hands. amen.