your nappy ass roots: Gary Coleman

Actor Gary Coleman was born February 8, 1968, in Zion, IL.  Shortly after his birth, he was adopted by a man named Kensuke Miyagi, an elderly gardener and karate master.  Together, they developed a new form of martial arts called knee-fu, a style of fighting built around the disabling of an opponent with powerful kicks and punches to the kneecaps.  A black belt in both karate and knee-fu by the age of 10, Coleman got into acting in hopes of introducing the world to this new style of fighting.

He began filming the sitcom Diff’rent Strokes in 1978.  Once the show had gained notable success, Coleman demonstrated his knee-fu prowess to the show’s producers and executives in hopes of having it worked into the script, but was instead met with a chorus of Awwwwwww! Okay, now do that kick thing again and then say, ‘Whatchu talkin’ bout, Willis??!’ Unwilling to compromise the integrity and dignity of knee-fu, he stayed on the show but vowed never to perform his art in public again.

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2 responses to “your nappy ass roots: Gary Coleman

  1. I’m mad at you for that Mr. Miyagi pic…
    I’m goin’ to the prayer corner for a minute to compose myself.

  2. WOW! That was hilarious!!!!!!!! haha!

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