Category Archives: pictures

this christmas, elmo says:


(saw this at Target yesterday.  tried to move his hand off his furry little crotch in the name of decency, but it’s sewed on there, so elmo really means that shit.)

mightiest mullet ever.

so a couple weeks ago i was havin lunch with a friend when i think i see something that i possibly couldn’t have seen out of the corner of my eye.  as long as i looked at him head-on, it was evident that i was looking at an asian man dressed in business casual clothing.  but then he turned around and…

‘…is that a tract of hair glued in the center of his head??’

I WAS SO THROWN!!  it really did look like he just had a regular guy’s hair cut and just laid a huge ream of Yaki in the middle of it, creating the mightiest mullet i have ever seen in my life.  and, need i remind you, i live in KENTUCKY, the #2 mullet capital of the world (indiana is #1).

and i dont know if this is racist or not, but what really messed me up about it was the fact that he was asian!  i have NEVER seen an asian man with a mullet before, and to have my first one be so dramatic.. i just didn’t know what to do with it.

so i took a picture of it.

im not good at being inconspicuous with my sneak picture taking so this is the best i could do.

Mel Gibson needs to hire some kittens.

so batshit Mel Gibson went a little bit batshittier in the days that i havent been updating.  im sure yall know that so we won’t go over the details.

but the homie young h of go in radio tweeted me a gem over the twitter earlier today and a lightbulb brighter than a thousand suns exploded over my head.  this is it!  here’s the answer!  from here on out, Mel Gibson, whenever you open your mouth to say any gotdamned thing, or when you have to respond to something else dumb and criminal that you’ve said:  say it with kittens.  straight up.  i mean you’ll still look like a dick with a chemical imbalance, but at least you’ll be able to make some people say ‘awwwww!’ in the process.

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family portrait of the day

mom:  “please hurry up and take the picture.  the valium is wearing off.”

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fun with google image search: Steve Harvey Suits

i was reminded of the ridiculous extraness of Steve Harvey’s suits today while workin on today’s post at SplackCent that required me to google the phrase ‘steve harvey suit.’  it’s quite a varied collection, with myriad colors and sizes to choose from.


Available Colors:

•Oh Lawd Lavendar
•Rench Around Red
•Have Mercy Mauve

Available Sizes:

•I Remember When Ike Hit Tina
•I Remember When Teddy P Hit That Tree
•I Remember When Marion Berry Hit That Pipe

Special Offer: Half off a pair of Gators in Righteous Robin’s Egg Blue

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oh, this is SCREAMING for a caption.

“Seriously, who draws a mustache and beard on somebody when they fall asleep?  REAL MATURE.”

“I told Cora Mae I wanted lilies and sequins on this church hat.  DO YOU SEE LILIES OR SEQUINS ON THIS CHURCH HAT??'”


fun with google image search: Olan Mills

here’s a confession for you:  i have never, ever taken an Olan Mills portrait, neither solo nor with family, and i gotta tell you… i feel like i’m missing out on an important part of the black experience.  one of my current life dreams/goals is to go get one of those 2-part pictures, the one with you sitting and smiling happily in the foreground, and a picture of your serious thoughtful face floating around in the back ground.  yall know what i’m talkin bout, right?

so until that happens, i have to sate myself with looking at others.  i found some fun ones via google’s image search.  not all of them are Olan Mills, but all of them are freakin hilarious.

*The library backdrop. Oh, why hello there, young scholar!  How lucky of you to find me here amongst my many leather-bound books!  It is here that I spend all of my days meandering among those who truly understand me: Tolstoy, Euripides, Kafka, and Sista Soulja.

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tiny pimp of the day



obscure r&b album covers of the day

so i guess its safe to say that r&b is becoming the underlying theme of this blog.  which is fine with me.  as long as asinine people keep stepping into studio, i’m not against discussing where they went wrong.

i got an early christmas gift today when my very good friend donnie gave me the link to a blog full of the most random, dated r&b that i’ve never heard of in my life.  the possibilities contained therein are ENDLESS.  i predict many more discussions on r&b coming from that link alone.  so you may thank him for this.

in no particular order, since they’re all equally ridiculous:

1.  Renaizzance – Intimate Thoughts

first, a question.. why did everybody feel the need to spell shit the wrong way?  ‘hello, ladies and gentlemen, we are Peaches and Cream, only it’s spelled PeichezzZ aynd Kriem beause we’re craft and clever.’  smh.  anyway.

u can’t convince me that that wasn’t done by somebody’s 14 yr old little brother with MS clipart and the first edition of Paint Shop Pro.  don’t it look like an airbrushed Rest in Peace t-shirt? (ps – WHY DO THEY HAVE A BEST OF ALBUM?)

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remember when lolcats were funny?

i can still remember the day i first stumbled onto those ridiculous pictures of cats with hilarious, grossly spelled and worded captions.  they were quirky.  they were random.  most importantly, they were funny.  now, they kinda suck.  no more surprise buttsecks or politically incorrect costumes or gratuitous harbls.  now they’re just… meh.  too much cute and corny.

whatever.  anyway, in my random internet journey this morning, i don’t know how i stumbled upon this collection of lolcats, but i did, and i cackled my fool head off.  i’m prolly the only nerd who cares but im puttin em up anyway bc this is my house and i will do as i damn please!

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