ive been thinking abt this for quite awhile. remember when remixes were remixes? i mean like, completely different songs? what happened to that? when did that stop? it’s like i just woke up one day and noticed that ppl were just takin original songs, slappin some wack verse by some random rapper on em and calling it a remix. that’s it. just lil somebody or young whoever talkin bout bullshit.
young people, this is NOT how you do it. that aint a remix; its an added verse. i want REAL remixes back! mix up the melody, do somethin different with the beat. a different mix, of the song. a re-mix, if you will. A REMIX.
you know, my soul is basically always at odd with puffy poppa diddy puff, but i will give him credit: that man could appreciate a remix. i’ll draw the line at him sayin he invented the shit, but. as a good example of what a remix should be, i’d like to put beneath the microscope 2 of mary j. blige’s best albums ever: ‘what’s the 411’ and the ‘what’s the 411’ remix album.
o yes. i said *remix album.*
we can’t get a decent SINGLE remix today, but back then? n!ggas had ENTIRE REMIX ALBUMS. OF REAL REMIXES.
here’s one of my favorite songs, ‘love no limit.’ this is the original.
now, here’s the remix.
i dont even have to say too much. aint nobody rappin on this shit. they’re not bein lazy and resting on that being the difference. they kept essentials & made a totally different song. and my soul screams YES! (c) probably the name of some wack ass chitlin circut play starring christopher williams & stony jackson. and here’s another good one: ‘let’s get married’ by jagged edge, original & remix. this is one of the two reasons i respect jermaine dupri. to be honest with you, i can’t remember reaon #2.
meanwhile, let’s look at ashanti’s ‘rain on me‘ and its “remix.”
that’s not a remix, that’s a LIE.
this is my official petition to re-remix the remix. because these new jack jerks are too damn young to be so lazy.
ive been waaay behind on all the trashy tv out there in the world today. ‘making the band’.. i dunno, it just got boring to me, so i havent been watching it. and of course, when i stop watching it is when all the good shit happens.
for just pennies a day, you can help keep these processed follicles moist!
so as the world knows by now, aubrey and d-woods are out of the group. that’s not the focal point of this entry. i’m all about moving on and rebuilding, so i propose that we jump straight to business and find a new member or two to fill in those missing spaces. i have a couple of what, in my estimation, are good candidates. in no particular order, im thinking:
**Stoney Jackson. dude. it’s time somebody gave stoney some real work. can he sing? iono, maybe. can he still dance? who cares? i’m just concerned for him and any children, if he has them. in the midst of this recession, im thinking stoney’s gonna be the first ‘please sir, can i have some more’in in the bread lines, by the looks of his upcoming project. he’s got a hungry jheri curl to feed. somebody have mercy.
**Cedric the Entertainer. i actually chose this one for his musical and dancerial merits. ced’s singing is cool. he might could stand a lesson or two from this legend, but he can hold his own. he got the dancin on lock tho. the image of him poplockin in an overly sequined outfit just makes me feel so warm inside. plus you know how he was like, always lookin for a reason to sing and dance on the steve harvey show and in his comedy specials? let the man gon’ head and have a shot at the stage. there’s no way he can be any worse than scarlett johansson.
**T-Baby. im thinking that this is definitely the main way to go. i think T-baby, whose hit single ‘it’s so cold in the d‘ is KILLIN the internet right now (both literally and figuratively). it’s the perfect way to introduce a new group of listeners to Danity Kane’s music. n!ggas in the D aint listenin to DK, IT’S TOO COLD OUT THERE. maybe she can help the girls keep peace once she figures it out how the fuck to do it. also, homegirl with the constant roll & rock bounce should officially become the group’s choreographer. boom-kat aint seein that.
**Charo. the girls are missing a couple of coochies. charo has many to spare.
**Ceephus & Reesie. twinkaah.. twin-kuuuuuuh.. littuuuuh starruuuuuuuuuuuuuhh.. how iiii wunduuuuh…. WHERE YOU BEEN?!